uber late post.(nov.21,’07)

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i was rummaging through my things when i found this.and i thought, ‘hey, maybe i’m not so chicken after all if i would post this.’ so i did.

i am indeed fighting the urge to bang my head to the wall. and i am so close in doing it.

 

see, i went to my favorite net cafe (suki ako) this evening to check my almost dead friendster and multiply account, to download news for my broadcast writing course and mainly, to research for PR.

on my way, i kind of wished i’d see him, *siya, ung taong gusto ko pero parang hindi pwede* cause i really, really miss him already.let’s just call him Mr. X (this is what you get for watching too much coffee prince).he lives two tumblings away from my house. my high school friend, and yeah, my kras.

so after an hour and a half of searching net postings and checking posts and giving out comments, i decided i’m going home, cause i might be in short of money, i’d be blacklisted in the shop. hehe.

but as it was raining pretty hard because of bagyong mina (really, name the typhoon after me)i decided to wait til the rain subsides. so i was looking outside, thinking about what to do when i come home. or should if i should start walking now like what i did the last time it rained.

then i look up, and there he was in his nursing uniform, holding an umbrella and walking past through were i stand.

woah! i never though my mind would go blank for a split second as i saw him. i wanted to scream out his name but i couldn’t, i’ve been weighing things out in my head and before i knew it, he was already out of sight.

i can’t believe i chickened out!it wasn’t me! i bully that person, i always ask him to fetch me and bring me back home when we go to parties or if its late at night, even during last year’s simbang gabi,we went together. ako ba talaga to?

ten minutes.

still no sign of the rain stopping. i’ve wasted ten minutes of thinking about what could’ve happened had i called him? what could we be talking about on our way home? what could have been his reaction when he sees me?

five more minutes.

big droplets of rain still pouring outside. i figured, i should probably go home now. it’s late. i have a chapter of damn statistics lecture to read.

and what’s worst? i am walking alone. under the rain. i don’t have him under the same umbrella. i may not see him again for a long time. and i might get sick for getting wet again.

jeez, this is so pathetic. next time, i’d be seizing the moment. no more thinking, cause i don’t know when will be the next time i’ll see him again, to think he’s just a few blocks away from my house.

 

it’s official. i am the most chicken person i know. and stupid. well, maybe just plain chicken, huh?

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takot pa din ako. kaya filtered ang blog na ‘to.bawal sa mga kakilala din siya personally. hehe

=)

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