…was the question I asked a friend who recently got married. Medyo nanibago lang ako kasi kakasimula pa lang ng 2013, my Facebook news feed is bombarded with wedding pictures, best wishes comments, bridal shower photos and even bridal queries na minsan nakaka-depress na mag-Facebook ha. Tapos someone from work is talking about marriege with her boyfriend na rin! Nakakaloka! Which is why the reason why I asked him: “Why the fuck is everyone getting married?”

“Dahil uso?” he answered after a while. Tagal talaga pinag-isipan?

No, seriously, “Why the fuck is everyone getting married?” Kapag nakabuntis ba dapat kasal agad? Di ba pwedeng live in na lang muna? O binyag sabi nga ni Patty? Why? Ikaw ba ang unang babaeng nanganak ng walang asawa? Ang anak mo ba ang unang illegitimate child sa mundo? (FYI. Please don’t tell me I won’t understand because I was an illegitimate child before. My parents got married when I was already 12.)

Okay. If you guys love each other, then by all means go! Walang pumipigil sa inyo. I’m just curious, that is why I’m asking the question.

Just this week, a very good friend from high school asked me if I’m still into wedding coordination (note that I did a super short stint in wedding coordination, can’t take all the mush) and I said no, but my friend knows a lot of suppliers that can really help her out for her wedding in March 2014.

Okay, so kinasal na siya sa Florida. She just wanted a wedding here in the country where people closest to her heart can attend. So I said I’d help her. Patty (the wedding coordinator) and I then discussed it and she told me the rough draft of everything.

TUNG UNU. Nakakalula. The prices are insane! I mean if I want my dream wedding, I’d have to sell my soul to the devil twice or marry a Zobel. Chos. Basta ang mahal, so my question again was “Why the fuck is everyone getting married?”

Ang mahaaaal! Ayoko na talaga. Ang hirap na nga humanap ng matinong lalaking papakasalan ka, ang mahal pa magpakasal! Huwes na lang daw, a friend told me. Huwes your face! I told him. Cheap shot. I’d rather be an old maid, like he said as well, if I’m not going to get my beach wedding. Charot.

Mapag-uusapan naman yan. Kung si Michael Rady yan sa huwes, by all means goooo!

Kaso hindi. So paano na? Carmi Martin peg na lang na stay beautiful and young at 49?

Deym. Ayoko maging old maid.

Pero seryoso, “Why the fuck is everyone getting married?” Fad ba ito? O nasa stage na lang talaga ang mga ka-batch ko ng pagpapakasal at pag-aanak at paglalandi habang ako iniisip ko pa rin kung sa papaanong paraan ako yayaman at gagawing miserable ang buhay ng boss-boss-an namin sa apartment? Charot.

Dahil ba Pebrero at nalalapit na ang very commercial na Araw Ng Mga Puso?

Coincidence lang ba ang lahat ng ito?

Hindi mo lang po ba sila tinuruan gumamit ng condom?

Dear Lord, why? Like why do I always end up liking guys who already have their valentine?

Shit. Now I”m so sabaw I don’t know how to end this. So ganito na lang, I’m leaving you with this scene from Got to Believe na paborito ng roomies ko na sina Ate Cheng and Ate Ana.

Toni: Karen…

Karen: hmmm??? (*smiles)

Toni: Mabait naman ako ‘di ba???

Karen: (*nods) Of course.

Toni: Mabuting tao naman ako ‘di ba?

Karen: The Best.

Toni: Maganda naman ako ‘di ba?

Karen: Beauty na, Brains pa!

Toni: Eh bakit walang nanliligaw sa’kin?

Karen: Hui, that’s not true girl ha…

Toni: Lahat na lang ng mga nanliligaw sa’kin, ‘yung mga ayaw ko. Lahat ng gusto ko ayaw sa’kin. Ba’t ganu’n? ‘Di ko na ba talaga makikita ‘yung Prince Charming ko?

E tapos natae siya.

Ang saklap.

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